The Dirtiest Car in the World

Yesterday Ellie was acting weird at school, so I picked her up early and decided to keep her home today to watch her. At school, her teacher said she kept falling asleep throughout the morning and didn’t want to participate in anything. Typically a Mrs. Kravitz, this was a sign that she likely wasn’t feeling…

Bad Advice

Before he left for work, I made an egg for my husband Ben to eat for breakfast. It was just the two of us in the kitchen and no little ears were around to hear us talking. “I just don’t understand why you think that her learning will slow down or just stop one day,”…

Perfect v. Wonderful

I’ve been trying to think of some profound statement on which to end 2020, but all I have is this: We are still standing. (Well, sort of. Between the hours of 5:30 a.m. and 8 p.m. we are destroying, creating and just trying to keep each other from getting hurt, but at 8:02 p.m. we…

My Only Girl

“I am glad that Ellie is your only girl.” I hear that or a variation of that a lot. Honestly, I have thought it myself on occasion. The idea is that if Ellie had a sister, she would grow up trying to be like her. The fear behind it is that if her sister were…

Should

“But right is not real, and should is a cage.” Glennon Doyle, Untamed I lost my car keys. I don’t do things like that. Everything has a place and I always put things back in their place. I know where everything in our house is hiding. Ben and the kids lose their stuff. Not me….

Why can’t you be more like Ellie?

Even though she has an undesired, greatly feared disability, I sure do think, “Why can’t you be more like Ellie?” a lot. I was scared of her before she was born. If I’m being honest, I am still scared of her. I obsess about her Down syndrome making her seem less than everyone else. I…

Motormouth

I talk a lot. I think it is likely the thing that drives my husband most crazy about me. I always need to talk about ‘it’ – whatever ‘it’ is. I have a master’s degree in communications, for goodness sake. I spent a decade in PR and non-profit development building relationships that I maintain even…

Let’s Go Play

We were at the library when my husband Ben asked me out on our first date. I was leaving from a meeting in one of the conference rooms when I ran into him looking at the used books for sale. I walked over to say hello, and he wrote my phone number down on the…

Pinball Wizard

“Can you try to calm down?” Ben asked me. I dropped what I was doing in the kitchen, said I would be back later, picked up my keys and wallet and walked (some might say “stormed”) out the front door. It was 10:30 a.m. Gus had been screaming all morning. Ellie was getting into everything…

We can do hard things.

The week in review through a series of short stories: Ben gets out of bed in the morning a few minutes before I do. Like a saint, he goes to the kitchen and starts the coffee while I sit and read the news. When I hear the coffee pot’s final beep, I stumble my way…